Why wait for the New Year, in 4 months, when I know there are things to change now. So I have some ok not some but a lot of things I am constantly thinking about changing or doing better, and a handful of things I am currently working on doing better. So our satelite tv has been off for a few months. When money is tight, it's not a priority. Also, I noticed Sadie and Hunter saying and doing things that they had learned on TV and even though a lot of it was cute and exciting, they did learn some things. But what about the things they did or said that were not good because they learned them on tv? I have decided that I am not willing to let those bad influences into their lives even if they are learning things. But I do know that the tv is not the only place for them to learn. Books, life experience, etc... So even when money is not tight, we will pretty much be cutting out a good portion of any tv.
I have many more things I want to fix and work on but I will spare you all at this very moment but encourage you to re-evaluate things in your life, good or bad. We need to make sure that we are putting our lives in order and doing those things that are the most important. Blah...I am getting on my soap box and I have no room to preach. Have a great holiday weekend and be safe!
Friday, August 29, 2008
Thursday, August 28, 2008
This week...
Well I hope this week is going well for any of you that happen to be reading this. I have been up and going more which feels good but I also noticed I am dead beat tired, and yet, I am not sleeping well. Could they be related? LOL, so part of this whole menopause thing can be insomnia. For anyone who knows me, I love to sleep. One of my favorite pass times. Right now, I think part of it is that I am not doing a whole lot physically so my body isn't tired, just my mind. So hopefully when I get the green light in 2 weeks to start being normal, my body will sleep when I go to bed at night. Anyways, the kids are doing great in school. Sadie has been starting to play the violin and Hunter is loving that he is in school all day. I have to tell you it makes my commuting a lot less hectic as well. McKadie is growing fast as ever. This week she has been eating a lot more "big kid" foods. We took her off formula a week early, I am sorry but with her having to be on Soy Formula and the rising prices of everything, she was making us broke broke broke...lol. So she loves whole milk and really likes to eat. I was told a certain sister of mine, no names to be mentioned **wink wink**(pudors) was allowing her to eat leaves yesterday and thought it was hysterical. Brian is working really hard up at the Real Soccer Stadium. He has been there since January and is excited to see it coming to an end. Their goal date to have it all finished is September 19th. They announced on the radio yesterday that they will be hosting college football games as well as the obvious soccer games. I am healing well, just fighting the tiredness, and that is about it.
Oh yeah, and the exciting news as of yesterday, although we don't have too many for sures yet, but it would appear that my whole family is going to be characters from the Twilight Series for Halloween. I know and am sure there will be many many more out there, but how many will have the whole crew.
Warning Warning Warning Spoiler for Book 4 approaching
So I am hoping that this is what we will have:
Bella: Katrina (This was an argument but because she called it first she got it) and she isn't sure if she wants to be premortal or mortal Bella
Edward: Katrina's husband Jon
Rosalie: Mindy (She wanted to be Bella)
Emmet: Min's husband Seth
Alice: We are trying to talk Natasha into it
Jasper: Natasha's boyfriend Nathan???
Esme: My mom
Carlisle: I think Colton looks the part for this one
Charlie: My dad
Jacob: We are going to ask my brother Lance, we aren't sure if he will do it though
Sam: Brian
Emily: Me:) I was thinking of wearing a sweater that says "La Push's Top Dog Lover" and of course we would have to do the scar down my face but isn't it Halloween???
"Nessie": We think that my niece Navi would work perfectly for this and since her mother is going to be Rosalie it would work out great considering the whole story plot
So we would only be missing Renee but I don't think she plays an big enough roll to be worried about, and yeah none of us really look like our characters but I think Natasha would be the closest thing to an Alice as long as we color her hair.
Well with all that being said. Have a great rest of the week and a safe holiday weekend. And Happy Birthday to Lance on the 30th and to my McKadie on the 2nd, just in case I am not on here before then.
Oh yeah, and the exciting news as of yesterday, although we don't have too many for sures yet, but it would appear that my whole family is going to be characters from the Twilight Series for Halloween. I know and am sure there will be many many more out there, but how many will have the whole crew.
Warning Warning Warning Spoiler for Book 4 approaching
So I am hoping that this is what we will have:
Bella: Katrina (This was an argument but because she called it first she got it) and she isn't sure if she wants to be premortal or mortal Bella
Edward: Katrina's husband Jon
Rosalie: Mindy (She wanted to be Bella)
Emmet: Min's husband Seth
Alice: We are trying to talk Natasha into it
Jasper: Natasha's boyfriend Nathan???
Esme: My mom
Carlisle: I think Colton looks the part for this one
Charlie: My dad
Jacob: We are going to ask my brother Lance, we aren't sure if he will do it though
Sam: Brian
Emily: Me:) I was thinking of wearing a sweater that says "La Push's Top Dog Lover" and of course we would have to do the scar down my face but isn't it Halloween???
"Nessie": We think that my niece Navi would work perfectly for this and since her mother is going to be Rosalie it would work out great considering the whole story plot
So we would only be missing Renee but I don't think she plays an big enough roll to be worried about, and yeah none of us really look like our characters but I think Natasha would be the closest thing to an Alice as long as we color her hair.
Well with all that being said. Have a great rest of the week and a safe holiday weekend. And Happy Birthday to Lance on the 30th and to my McKadie on the 2nd, just in case I am not on here before then.
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
99 Balloons
I tried to add this link to my other inspirational lists but I failed and don't have much time right now to figure it out. So here you go http://www.ignitermedia.com/products/iv/singles/570/99-Balloons_ I had some tears but I really liked this and it reminded me to remember the important things! Have a great day!!!
Sunday, August 24, 2008
Hmmm....
Hmmmmm...
That is what I am thinking right now when I am trying to decide what I want to talk about or babble about right now. There are so many meaningful things and then again so many meaningless things that I could go on about. So hmmmm...
Right now I am sitting in my home, Brian is taking his Sunday nap, Sadie and Hunter are downstairs coloring, and McKadie is sleeping. Hunter just came upstairs to ask if he could use the pencil sharpener, I tell him yes and then he leans in and kisses my forehead. So maybe that is what I will write about first. Being a mom in Zion.
What does it mean to be a mom in Zion? Yikes, have I lived up to those expectations in the last 8 years? Will He be pleased with what I have done? My heart says that I have done the best with what I was allowed, but it also tells me that I have slacked in many areas.
I don't know about any of you reading this but I am probably not alone when I say, there are so many other women doing it better than me.
I read these blogs and see all the wonderful things these Women in Zion are doing with their kids and my heart is sad. Are my kids ok? Do they know that I love them more than anything? What can I do to be better? This is where I am hopeful. This hysterectomy has left me feeling better than I have been in years. Once I am over the restrictions of an abdominal surgery, I feel a huge piece of hope that I will be able to finally start being that mom and wife that I hope to be.
Do we have FHE? I try to make sure we do have it weekly but we aren't perfect, there have been weeks that have gone by without it but we do try. Do we have daily family scriptures? This one is hard because there have been periods of time where we have it daily for months, and then there are months when we don't have it. Do we have daily family prayer? We try. It is more frequent than scriptures and I am a huge believer in the power of prayer, so I have it in the foremost of my mind to make sure we have it, but again we are far from perfect. Do I yell at my kids? Sadly yes, more than I would like to admit. Do I tell them that I love them? Daily if not hourly. Do they know that their Heavenly Father loves them? I hope so, we talk about it every morning before school. Do they know they are children of God? I am grateful to say yes.
There is so much more room for improvement...and I will try. It's never too late.
So then I think about these wonderful women in Zion who do the above and beyond with their kids. My sister Katrina is one of them. She makes time and opens opportunities for her kids to do wonderful things. For example, there is a couple in Mesa, AZ that was recently in a plane crash http://nieniedialogues.blogspot.com/. Katrina was telling me about it yesterday and was talking about all of the donations and things people are doing for this couple and their 4 children. She said she was going to get some things together to help her kids make cards for this couple and send it to them as a service project. What a great example she is to me and to her children. A shining example of a Daughter in Zion as well as a wonderful mother.
Another wonderful woman in Zion is my mom. Geesh, I get choked up thinking about all she has endured and has yet to endure. Life has not always thrown her the easy slice of pie. Just a quick run down, I was born before mom and dad's 1st annivesary and just before my 1st birthday we moved to Holland. Mom has expressed how difficult it was for her to be away from her family and friends and then to be with all of these foreign speaking people and not knowing how to communicate with them and so on. We were there for 4 almost 5 years. Then just being the wife of a military man is difficult. I have mentioned it before but just before I turned 15 my dad went to prison. I have a few siblings that have had some really hard bumps in the road of life and even some massive potholes, and my mom has been there for each of them thru and thru. Some examples of that, I have a sister who got pregnant at the age of 16, mom was right there to help her with it. Then the weddings that she dealt with on her own, without dad. I have a brother who had some problems with the law in his mid teenage years and she was with him through it all, going to court, visiting him in jail regularly. Not to mention that she made sure that we were able to visit dad regularly. Recently she has been there for a sister whose husband was nearly killed on November 1st of 2006, and then my dad suffered a stroke 10 days later. 2 months prior to that we found out that one of my sisters was fighting a drug addiction to Heroin. Life has dealt her quite the hand and yet her faith never faulters. She is valiant to the Lord and is always there to make sure that the gospel principles are being followed and lived. What a woman in ZION. I can only hope to be half that woman she is.
So with this entry in hand and having done a self evaluation of who I am and who I want to be, I can only hope that I am blessed with the patience and knowledge to better myself as a mother, a wife, a daughter, a sister, an aunt and a Woman in Zion.
Please know that we are all loved by our Father in Heaven. We are all choice Daughters and Sons of a Heavenly Father who will always be there for us, even when we don't feel we are worthy of his presence. Don't let go, hold on to Him, pray to Him, tell Him of your struggles, your joys, your pains. He knows your name, He knows your pain. On this blogs playlist please listen to 2 songs on it. The first one is Every Breath by Jenny Phillips and then the other one is Maker's Touch by Jenny Phillips. Listen to the lyrics and know without a doubt that you are a Daughter in Zion or Son:)
That is what I am thinking right now when I am trying to decide what I want to talk about or babble about right now. There are so many meaningful things and then again so many meaningless things that I could go on about. So hmmmm...
Right now I am sitting in my home, Brian is taking his Sunday nap, Sadie and Hunter are downstairs coloring, and McKadie is sleeping. Hunter just came upstairs to ask if he could use the pencil sharpener, I tell him yes and then he leans in and kisses my forehead. So maybe that is what I will write about first. Being a mom in Zion.
What does it mean to be a mom in Zion? Yikes, have I lived up to those expectations in the last 8 years? Will He be pleased with what I have done? My heart says that I have done the best with what I was allowed, but it also tells me that I have slacked in many areas.
I don't know about any of you reading this but I am probably not alone when I say, there are so many other women doing it better than me.
I read these blogs and see all the wonderful things these Women in Zion are doing with their kids and my heart is sad. Are my kids ok? Do they know that I love them more than anything? What can I do to be better? This is where I am hopeful. This hysterectomy has left me feeling better than I have been in years. Once I am over the restrictions of an abdominal surgery, I feel a huge piece of hope that I will be able to finally start being that mom and wife that I hope to be.
Do we have FHE? I try to make sure we do have it weekly but we aren't perfect, there have been weeks that have gone by without it but we do try. Do we have daily family scriptures? This one is hard because there have been periods of time where we have it daily for months, and then there are months when we don't have it. Do we have daily family prayer? We try. It is more frequent than scriptures and I am a huge believer in the power of prayer, so I have it in the foremost of my mind to make sure we have it, but again we are far from perfect. Do I yell at my kids? Sadly yes, more than I would like to admit. Do I tell them that I love them? Daily if not hourly. Do they know that their Heavenly Father loves them? I hope so, we talk about it every morning before school. Do they know they are children of God? I am grateful to say yes.
There is so much more room for improvement...and I will try. It's never too late.
So then I think about these wonderful women in Zion who do the above and beyond with their kids. My sister Katrina is one of them. She makes time and opens opportunities for her kids to do wonderful things. For example, there is a couple in Mesa, AZ that was recently in a plane crash http://nieniedialogues.blogspot.com/. Katrina was telling me about it yesterday and was talking about all of the donations and things people are doing for this couple and their 4 children. She said she was going to get some things together to help her kids make cards for this couple and send it to them as a service project. What a great example she is to me and to her children. A shining example of a Daughter in Zion as well as a wonderful mother.
Another wonderful woman in Zion is my mom. Geesh, I get choked up thinking about all she has endured and has yet to endure. Life has not always thrown her the easy slice of pie. Just a quick run down, I was born before mom and dad's 1st annivesary and just before my 1st birthday we moved to Holland. Mom has expressed how difficult it was for her to be away from her family and friends and then to be with all of these foreign speaking people and not knowing how to communicate with them and so on. We were there for 4 almost 5 years. Then just being the wife of a military man is difficult. I have mentioned it before but just before I turned 15 my dad went to prison. I have a few siblings that have had some really hard bumps in the road of life and even some massive potholes, and my mom has been there for each of them thru and thru. Some examples of that, I have a sister who got pregnant at the age of 16, mom was right there to help her with it. Then the weddings that she dealt with on her own, without dad. I have a brother who had some problems with the law in his mid teenage years and she was with him through it all, going to court, visiting him in jail regularly. Not to mention that she made sure that we were able to visit dad regularly. Recently she has been there for a sister whose husband was nearly killed on November 1st of 2006, and then my dad suffered a stroke 10 days later. 2 months prior to that we found out that one of my sisters was fighting a drug addiction to Heroin. Life has dealt her quite the hand and yet her faith never faulters. She is valiant to the Lord and is always there to make sure that the gospel principles are being followed and lived. What a woman in ZION. I can only hope to be half that woman she is.
So with this entry in hand and having done a self evaluation of who I am and who I want to be, I can only hope that I am blessed with the patience and knowledge to better myself as a mother, a wife, a daughter, a sister, an aunt and a Woman in Zion.
Please know that we are all loved by our Father in Heaven. We are all choice Daughters and Sons of a Heavenly Father who will always be there for us, even when we don't feel we are worthy of his presence. Don't let go, hold on to Him, pray to Him, tell Him of your struggles, your joys, your pains. He knows your name, He knows your pain. On this blogs playlist please listen to 2 songs on it. The first one is Every Breath by Jenny Phillips and then the other one is Maker's Touch by Jenny Phillips. Listen to the lyrics and know without a doubt that you are a Daughter in Zion or Son:)
Wednesday, August 13, 2008
So sorry...
I have neglected you all. So sorry... I have given a couple of updates on my family blog at http://www.btshgillman.blogspot.com/ if you're really curious to know what has been happening. I have just had a lot going on and a lot I wanted to say and was afraid that if I got on here I wouldn't feel good enough to finish.
First of all the surgery went wonderfully. Out of the 4 surgeries that I have had, this one has been the biggest deal and also the best recovery. I haven't had any problems moving around, even that first day wasn't so bad, maybe because I knew what to expect. I haven't had any infections (knocking on wood) or anything serious like that. The down fall is due to the fact that I have pretty much been off and on pain pills the last 6 years due to the dumb and not never again CYSTS, I have a higher tolerance to the pain meds. They had to give me more than the norm just to get the pain under control for the first couple of days in the hospital. But I am happy to say that by day 10 post-op I was pain med free!!!
I had surgery on Wednesday and was released late Saturday morning. I have been having major hot flashes, anxiety attacks (which if you have never had they totally suck), and not being able to sleep worth nothing. So a few days ago we switched up the hormones and he wrote me a script for the sleeping meds. The last few nights have been heaven!!!
All I have to say is that when or if you ever have to deal with menopause, either as the woman or the lovely man with that woman, GOOD LUCK!!! I am blessed enough that I don't have to suffer through it for years at a time like my gracefully aging female family members have been doing...no names given. As far as I know mine is temporary...or so Brian hopes:) But the new HRT seems to be doing wonders and now that I am sleeping life is good.
I had my 2 week post-op appointment yesterday and the doctor couldn't agree more, everything looks wonderful. He expressed to me that he was very concerned about doing the surgery because I was so young. It was a very hard decision for Brian and I to make but I am glad we did it. The doctor told me that my labs came back and said that I had something called adenomyosis, which is in the same family as endometriosis. He said there is no cure for it except for a hysterectomy. With that being said he expressed that although he was very nervous about doing the surgery that he believed that we did make the right choice in the end.
How awesome is that?!? I feel better than I have felt in years, and that's including the still healing external and internal incisions. I took Sadie and Hunter to get some last minute school supplies yesterday and I also was able to go to their Back To School Night and unfortunately I pushed it too far. By the time I drove Bri to school near the airport in SLC, drove to my parent's house, to Wal-mart, to my parent's, to my doctors apt., to my parent's house and then out to pick up Brian I was pretty much done for the day. Unfortunately we had more to do. Brian was beat from all of the schooling and side jobs he has been doing and was in no mood to cook, I was too tired to cook so we headed to good ole Applebee's. We were done just in time to head to the school and by the time we got home I was thrashed. My downfall is that I love to talk and visit with everyone.
The kids weren't the only ones excited to see old friends. I was greatful to see a bunch of parents and especially Sadie and Hunter's teachers from last year. So what is going on now with our lives?
I have 4 more weeks of recovery before I am allowed to do any lifting or cleaning still. Brian passed this week of school and with one more week to go in October he will be preparing to take his Journeyman's test for an electrician. The downfall is that he still has 3 or 4 more weeks after that before he is completely done. Getting his License as an electrician has been a long time coming, it will be 5 years of schooling by the time all is said and done. I am so proud of him. It has not been easy, especially with all of my illness and a new baby at home.
Sadie is entering the 3rd grade. Wow, talk about making you feel old, she has done well. She will be starting the violin and is so excited. We are excited for her. She has been a super helper for me and Brian since the surgery. She is great at helping with dishes and laundry and whatever else needs tending to. She is also very head strong so we are bracing ourselves for the coming years as a teenager, may Heaven help us all:)
Hunter is entering the 1st grade. He is so excited to be going all day and to be able to have 3 recesses and lunch at school. He is a great little/big brother to the girls and tries to keep his control considering all of the estrogen in the house. Between Hunter and Brian I am glad they are making it through this. I have been an emotional roller coaster since the surgery and poor Brian doesn't know what to do with me. Hunter will be turning 7 in October and is thrilled. We were watching the Olympics the other night and he expressed that he would like to try fencing. I thought how awesome that is because we didn't think with his metabolic myopathy he would ever be able to do any sports. What a kid!!!
My little McKadie turns a year old on September 2nd and my heart is breaking. She is our last baby and she has grown so fast. Her favorite word is Hi. And the funny thing is that she knows it is a greeting and uses it as such. It's so adorable.
So our future is looking much brighter and I am excited to face it with a healthy body. Oh yeah and I have lost 6 lbs. now. I am hoping to loose a lot more. Well I'm off until next time!!!
First of all the surgery went wonderfully. Out of the 4 surgeries that I have had, this one has been the biggest deal and also the best recovery. I haven't had any problems moving around, even that first day wasn't so bad, maybe because I knew what to expect. I haven't had any infections (knocking on wood) or anything serious like that. The down fall is due to the fact that I have pretty much been off and on pain pills the last 6 years due to the dumb and not never again CYSTS, I have a higher tolerance to the pain meds. They had to give me more than the norm just to get the pain under control for the first couple of days in the hospital. But I am happy to say that by day 10 post-op I was pain med free!!!
I had surgery on Wednesday and was released late Saturday morning. I have been having major hot flashes, anxiety attacks (which if you have never had they totally suck), and not being able to sleep worth nothing. So a few days ago we switched up the hormones and he wrote me a script for the sleeping meds. The last few nights have been heaven!!!
All I have to say is that when or if you ever have to deal with menopause, either as the woman or the lovely man with that woman, GOOD LUCK!!! I am blessed enough that I don't have to suffer through it for years at a time like my gracefully aging female family members have been doing...no names given. As far as I know mine is temporary...or so Brian hopes:) But the new HRT seems to be doing wonders and now that I am sleeping life is good.
I had my 2 week post-op appointment yesterday and the doctor couldn't agree more, everything looks wonderful. He expressed to me that he was very concerned about doing the surgery because I was so young. It was a very hard decision for Brian and I to make but I am glad we did it. The doctor told me that my labs came back and said that I had something called adenomyosis, which is in the same family as endometriosis. He said there is no cure for it except for a hysterectomy. With that being said he expressed that although he was very nervous about doing the surgery that he believed that we did make the right choice in the end.
How awesome is that?!? I feel better than I have felt in years, and that's including the still healing external and internal incisions. I took Sadie and Hunter to get some last minute school supplies yesterday and I also was able to go to their Back To School Night and unfortunately I pushed it too far. By the time I drove Bri to school near the airport in SLC, drove to my parent's house, to Wal-mart, to my parent's, to my doctors apt., to my parent's house and then out to pick up Brian I was pretty much done for the day. Unfortunately we had more to do. Brian was beat from all of the schooling and side jobs he has been doing and was in no mood to cook, I was too tired to cook so we headed to good ole Applebee's. We were done just in time to head to the school and by the time we got home I was thrashed. My downfall is that I love to talk and visit with everyone.
The kids weren't the only ones excited to see old friends. I was greatful to see a bunch of parents and especially Sadie and Hunter's teachers from last year. So what is going on now with our lives?
I have 4 more weeks of recovery before I am allowed to do any lifting or cleaning still. Brian passed this week of school and with one more week to go in October he will be preparing to take his Journeyman's test for an electrician. The downfall is that he still has 3 or 4 more weeks after that before he is completely done. Getting his License as an electrician has been a long time coming, it will be 5 years of schooling by the time all is said and done. I am so proud of him. It has not been easy, especially with all of my illness and a new baby at home.
Sadie is entering the 3rd grade. Wow, talk about making you feel old, she has done well. She will be starting the violin and is so excited. We are excited for her. She has been a super helper for me and Brian since the surgery. She is great at helping with dishes and laundry and whatever else needs tending to. She is also very head strong so we are bracing ourselves for the coming years as a teenager, may Heaven help us all:)
Hunter is entering the 1st grade. He is so excited to be going all day and to be able to have 3 recesses and lunch at school. He is a great little/big brother to the girls and tries to keep his control considering all of the estrogen in the house. Between Hunter and Brian I am glad they are making it through this. I have been an emotional roller coaster since the surgery and poor Brian doesn't know what to do with me. Hunter will be turning 7 in October and is thrilled. We were watching the Olympics the other night and he expressed that he would like to try fencing. I thought how awesome that is because we didn't think with his metabolic myopathy he would ever be able to do any sports. What a kid!!!
My little McKadie turns a year old on September 2nd and my heart is breaking. She is our last baby and she has grown so fast. Her favorite word is Hi. And the funny thing is that she knows it is a greeting and uses it as such. It's so adorable.
So our future is looking much brighter and I am excited to face it with a healthy body. Oh yeah and I have lost 6 lbs. now. I am hoping to loose a lot more. Well I'm off until next time!!!
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